Friday, July 6, 2012

4th of July

He makes money for eating like a pig

First of all, I hope everyone had a Happy 4th.

Second of all, I'd like to give a big middle finger to ESPN.  So the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest, which has become a national pastime similar to baseball or full fat cheese, always airs live at 9 AM on ESPN (noon eastern time).  For some odd reason this year, Nathan's decided to have the competition at 3 PM instead of noon.  When they realized how weird of an idea this was, they moved it back to noon, however by that time ESPN had already filled that time slot with Wimbledon.  Oops.

The only way to watch the contest live was to stream it on ESPN3.  However, ESPN3 makes you sign up through your cable provider, so if you can't do that then you're SOL. It's not that this is a ridiculously hard task,'s just annoying.  It's the same with Fox.  A few years back they used to upload Hell's Kitchen episodes to their website the day after they aired and you could watch them without even signing up.  Now? You gotta do this goofy sign-up through your cable provider or wait 8 days after the initial airing for the episodes to be available.  Hey Fox, you ever hear of YouTube?  It's this really cool new website where people on the east coast upload HK episodes THE SECOND AFTER THEY'RE DONE AIRING.  Legal?  Probably not.  Convenient?  Oh yeah.  8 days? HA!

ESPN still aired the contest in its reserved noon time slot, but by then it was tape delayed and had been over for 3 hours.  To no one's surprise, Joey Chestnut once again annihilated the competition, downing a record-tying 68 hot dogs in 10 minutes for his 6th straight title.  Chestnut is a total baller but without Kobayashi there it's not a competition anymore. The best years of this contest were 2006-2008.  In 2006, Chestnut gave Kobayashi a run for his money but in the end lost 53.75 to 52.  I remember this one distinctly because Chestnut looked like he was about to puke up a tractor the entire time.  The next year Chestnut defeated Kobayashi 66-63, ending his 6-year title run.  The next year they went into overtime with Chestnut defeating Kobayashi by a bite.  Ever since then it's been Chestnut's game.

Sure, they had one more great duel in 2009, but by then this was Chestnut's reign and no one was taking that away.  Kobayashi hasn't returned to the contest since due to contract disputes, so really it's just a question of how many dogs can Chestnut down rather than who's gonna come in first.  Guys like Eater X and Bertoletti have been doing this for years as well and while their numbers continue to rise, they're YEARS behind Chestnut's abilities. They finished second and third this year with 52 and 51 dogs and were actually leading the pack halfway through and wound up LOSING by double digits.  I dunno man.  Chestnut is awesome but I wish there was more parity. Like in hockey.

On another note, there's something really, really attractive about a woman eating 45 hot dogs in 10 minutes.  Just sayin'.

Anyway, here's some of what I ate:

Mmmmmm chili

I didn't down 68 of these bad boys, but I did eat 5 of them.  I was hoping to go for more but apparently I wasn't as hungry as I thought I was. 

A dessert that needs no introduction

The All American Dessert!