Sunday, December 30, 2012

Godiva and the Photoshopped Camera Lens

Godiva has always been a pretty solid manufacturer of chocolate candies and other sugary goodies.  That's why I was so shocked when I ripped into a bag of milk strawberry truffles to find this:

Apparently they had their caramel diarrhea filter on

I've sent these pictures to Godiva for an explanation because if you've been reading this blog long enough then you know how much I dislike trick photography and deceptive advertising.  However, I'm not passing judgment yet.  I want to see what they have to say...THEN I'll pass judgment.  Giving me something brown when it should be pink is unacceptable. 

Friday, December 28, 2012

The Second Most Wonderful Meal of the Year

The first being Thanksgiving of course, but we established that a long time ago.  So, CHRISTMAS!  Hope everyone had a great one.  You know I did and I've got the pictures to prove it...

...unfortunately, like a total dumbass, I forgot to take a picture of my uneaten Christmas meal.  Yeah, I don't know what happened either.  So we've gotta be a little creative here:

I reconstructed my dinner plate with leftovers.  If Marty McFly were time travelling back and forth he wouldn't be able to tell the difference.

So we've got a 15 pound turkey which was outstanding of course, mashed potatoes cooked by me, which were outstanding of course, stuffing, sweet potato "stoplights", and a Christmas Sandwich. 

The table before it got all messy

On the flip side

Dessert - cherry and blueberry pie

Double the pleasure, double the fun

All American Dessert - Christmas Edition

Unfortunately the All American didn't turn out the way I had hoped.  First of all I forgot to put the grapes in which pissed me off.  Second, I used a different brand of poundcake which didn't seem to absorb the whipped cream very well.  I mean, yeah, it still tastes good but I dropped the ball.


More leftovers

Ok, so I actually did take a picture of my dinner...when it was half eaten.

I love my fans, that's the only reason I would post a half-eaten plate of food.  Fart jokes and carbohydrates have gotten Greg's Gourmet this far, so why not some half-eaten meals?  

Anyway, hope everyone had a great holiday!

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Christmas Eve/Eve of Christmas Eve

I'm really not a big fan of Panda Express.  There was a Panda at State while I was there and it was always one of the busiest eateries on campus.  My suite mate would eat there virtually every day, pigging out on orange chicken and then clogging the toilet later in the evening.

When I'm up in Valencia we sometimes get Panda for dinner at which point I feel underwhelmed, kinda like when you realize that regardless of who you vote for in an election you're still probably voting for a douchebag.

It's been a longstanding Jewish tradition to have Chinese food for Christmas Eve dinner.  Unfortunately one of the few drawbacks of San Diego is its seeming lack of quality Chinese food.  When the Union Tribune, with over a million subscribers, lists Panda Express as the best Chinese food in the city then you've got big problems.  I mean, the Union Tribune is a complete joke of a paper and everyone knows it, but still.  Either way, I've gotten used to Panda on Christmas Eve the past couple years because I realize it's just an appetizer for the REAL meal the following day.

Panda Express is Chinese food in the theoretical sense

I'll post Christmas food pictures next time.  Instead I wanna take a step back to the meal on the Eve of Christmas Eve, which of course has to be In-N-Out:

Most states don't even have In-N-Out...LOLOLOLOLOL

Double-double and Animal Style fries - can't beat that.  Well, except maybe this:

If it had about 98% less fat I'd probably eat this everyday

Just needed to post that for good measure.  Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone!  

Sunday, December 23, 2012

"Apocalyptic" Gourmet

So yeah, the Mayans were wrong.  Remember a couple years ago when the movie 2012 came out at the height of all this hype?  And all anyone can remember now of that movie is how bad it is?  Yeah...

Anyway, just in case the world did explode I decided to go on an all-out eating binge.  My thoughts were that if the world blew up then at least I enjoyed some good food.  And if the world didn't explode then it's just a typical Greg's Gourmet day.  Naturally I had to start off with some McD's:

The grease on the right burger serves as a mirror so I can see my multiple chins form in real time

A pair of double cheeseburgers and fries - 100% of the time it's a good meal all the time.

Dinnertime: Another favorite meal of mine - Mac N Cheese:

Good as a 5 year old, even better now

If you've never read my post on how to make really good Mac N Cheese, then click here to check out the instructions.  I mixed some meatballs in here for extra flavor and texture.  It was nice.  But what's a couple hearty meals without an even more hearty dessert?  SCONE TIME!

A scone to close the binge - good deal

Just your ordinary gigantic scone from Charlie's Best Bread.  You know, the usual.  

As I said, just another day for Greg's Gourmet in the event that Luke Skywalker didn't fire a couple photon torpedoes into the Earth's core. 

Happy holidays everyone!

Monday, December 10, 2012

The Return of the Lumberjack

It's amazing to me how long ago it was that a little lakeside joint called Lake Murray Cafe used to be my Seinfeld equivalent of the coffee shop.  It's been two years since they sold me half-baked dinner rolls for Thanksgiving, effectively ruining our appetites at dinnertime as well as leftovers the following day.  That was the last straw in a steep decline for a restaurant that was once known for delicious and generous meals at low prices while complemented with amazing service.

Over time their portions got smaller, their food quality got crappier, and every time a new waitress/waiter came on there just seemed to be a lack of interest that previous servers had.  Their French toast once gave me violent food poisoning and the owner is successful but a questionable decision maker.  Think Mark Suckerberg; worth billions but has no idea how to run a company with a positive brand image.  Seriously, what good things can be said for how Facebook is run?

Anyway, we decided to check out the Murray just for the heck of it.  I ordered the classic Lumberjack, which is 3 eggs, 4 strips of bacon, 3 sausage links, a half plate of potatoes, and 3 plate sized pancakes.  We used to make it a competition to see who could down it and if you failed then you got made fun of.  This trip I calmly downed it pretty easily:

The meal's borders go to the pancakes

You know what?  It was really, really good.  It captured the quality and charm that used to be the reason we would come here a couple times a month.  Really delicious.  It was 2 dollars more expensive than it was the last time I had it but whatever. 

But there was one flaw at the table that we anticipated.  See those giant plate-sized pancakes that came with my meal?  Okay, so, my friend Josh ordered a Chorizo Scramble which also comes with pancakes.  For a long time pancakes came in one size: big.  And with the Lumberjack that still rings true, but with other dishes?  Check out this meal I had last year that shows the kind of crap they're pulling.  Yeah, they're plate-sized pancakes, but that's like a frickin' plate you'd use for a cup of frickin' tea.  Those are frickin' frozen aisle pancakes.  ON THE SAME TABLE! 

This is what I'm talking about.  I understand that food is getting more expensive but how painfully stupid is it that the owner of this joint actually approves of having two servings of pancakes at the same table in different sizes?  Gordon Ramsay would be blowing his top with all kinds of British swears and taunts. 

So, yeah, it was good.  But this place seriously needs new management.  Like, really.


Friday, December 7, 2012

The Ultimate Scone

I know I post a lot of these, but check out the size of this beauty of a scone I picked up from Charlie's Best Bread in Pacific Beach today:

It's nearly the size of the whole frickin' plate!

I had my palm wide open, fingers spread and they barely surfaced outside the rim of the scone.  That's how absolutely massive this thing is.  Big and beautiful.

By the way, does anyone have any recommendations on where to purchase good dinner rolls?  The past few years we haven't been very successful in finding quality dinner rolls so I'm open to all suggestions.

Eat on!