Tuesday, August 28, 2012

MasterChef Recap Episode 18

Episode 18

If you haven't seen this episode and are guessing which one of these two guys goes home, you'd be wrong

WHAT.  THE.  HELL?????  JOSH REALLY DEFEATED FRANK IN THE ELIMINATION TEST??? HOW THE HELL IS THIS HUMANLY POSSIBLE? Frank has been solid all season long!  Josh?  He just kinda sucks.  I mean, he's had his moments but he's been far worse than Frank has.  JOSH GOT SENT HOME ONCE ALREADY!  THAT'S HOW MUCH OF A BETTER CHEF FRANK IS!

Christine, confused goals: "I think being in the top 4 means a lot to me."  You think??? What are you even doing here???

Christine/Becky: Joe suggested it best that Christine's pallet paired with Becky's plating skills make this a terrific team.

Frank/Josh: Josh is still fuming over Frank saving himself rather than a teammate and I think that may get in the way of their cooking.  If this was every man for himself, Josh would easily be the next to go, but if the guys beat the girls then it's gonna throw a wrench in whoever goes to the finals.

Pompous Meter: I realize these chefs are universally famous and have cooked for the likes of Genghis Kahn and the first administration of Grover Cleveland's presidency, but what's this nonsense of walking in during the middle of the meal preparation?  Like, what's the point of Gordon mentioning that their plane is just touching down in LA as they're about to start cooking?  Yes, that's probably not what happened, but having these guys walk in while these chefs are in the middle of cooking just reeked of pompousness.  Where's the punctuality?  Introduce them after the meals are done or something.  Introducing them as the first, second, and third emperors of the Han Dynasty just didn't work at all for me.

Famous judges, no personality: This is boring.  All I'm hearing out of these three judges are "mumble mumble mumble tastes good/bad mumble mumble mumble."

Girls vs. Boys: Not a shocker at all that the girls won.  If anything, Christine pairing herself with Becky pretty much ensured them a slot in the top three.  If the boys won it would just be awkward to have Christine and Becky competing in an elimination test when the obvious weakest chef is Josh.  I'm not necessarily saying this was fixed, but I'm just sayin' (note: yes, I wrote this prior to the actual elimination revelation).

Soufflé: I've never been a big fan of soufflés.  Call me remarkably brilliant, but I prefer a nice piece of cake.  But three perfect different flavored soufflés in an hour is ridiculous even for someone of my non-existent soufflé experience.

Ramsay, brutally honest: "Honestly, guys, it's almost impossible."

Frank, smartass: "Why can't you guys all eat the same one?"  In reality he's saying what we're all thinking.

Joe: "I think in the history of MasterChef we've given them a challenge that's not doable."  Well, that wasn't very nice of you now was it, Joe?

Graham: "It's all out of their hands now. It's in the oven!"

Ramsay, Captain Obvious: "90 seconds to go, COME ON!"  It always bugs me when Ramsay repeats "COME ON" over and over and over again, especially when just two seconds ago Graham said "it's all out of their hands now. It's in the oven!"  What is he saying come on to?  The oven?  Hoping an inanimate object will plate the desserts faster?

Worst Elimination Ever: I don't know how or why this happened, but somehow Frank went home.  I'm seriously shocked.  It's not that I dislike Josh - quite the opposite.  If he was in Hell's Kitchen I'd be rooting for him to win.  But Frank is far and away the superior chef.  I just don't get this.  Also - David Martinez was offered a job in one of Graham's restaurants.  DAVID F-ING MARTINEZ!  David "I'm not a joke" Martinez who squandered every advantage he was given in MasterChef got himself a job working in one of Graham Elliot's restaurants.  Meanwhile what does Frank get?  A premature exit and his manhood crushed into a million pieces.  This seriously makes no sense at all.  I'm disappointed that an otherwise terrific season has seemingly fallen apart in the span of a few minutes.

Maybe Josh's chocolate soufflé was slightly better than Frank's.  But to say that Josh is more worthy to continue competing for the title of MasterChef over Frank is just ludicrous.  Consider past returns - Frank has been on top of this competition the entire time.  He hasn't struggled, he hasn't fallen, he hasn't delivered any crappy dishes as far as I can recall.  But Josh?  The dude was already eliminated once.  He's been in the bottom of the group for his performances more than once.  How the FARK does he make it to the top 3 over Frank?  Makes no sense.

Okay, so, the wrench has obviously been thrown.  Josh will not win MasterChef, that's obvious.  Tonight was the "shocking elimination" that they promise every week only this time they finally delivered.  It'll be either Becky or Christine and I hope it's them two competing in the finals because Josh hasn't done nearly enough to earn that spot.