Tuesday, August 14, 2012

MasterChef Recap Episode 16

Episode 16

Ok, I have to rant about Hotel Hell for a second:

Seriously, Fox? Is a naked Gordon Ramsay really necessary?

Ramsay Rant #385: SERIOUSLY??? Gordon Ramsay naked? WHY? What's the point of this nonsense other than to generate discussion from celebrity bloggers such as myself? This once again reinstates my belief that Gordon Ramsay is spreading himself too thin (no pun intended).  This is nothing more than to generate discussion and revenue for the jerk producer who said "hey, we need some nudity in Gordon Ramsay's new show!"  Unbelievable.  Hotel Hell is just alright.  I like the food aspect of it, but other than that there's nothing overly special here.  Whatever.  I'll probably get a million views cause of the above picture.

Team Challenge: I like it when they bring a little bit of Hell's Kitchen (back when it was good) into MasterChef. But David Martinez picked second overall? Over Monti? What in the world?

Those appetizers and entrees look really good despite the fact that I can't actually pronounce any of them. 

Christine: "Monti can't hear and I can't see. Team Helen Keller!"  I love Christine's sense of humor.

Joe, massive Douche Alarm going off on Christine's culinary ability: "Definitely coat check room. She can't see. This is a live kitchen, Michelin starred restaurant. She can't do it, she's a liability."  Dude, really? And who was it who brought this liability into the MasterChef competition? And has kept her around into the top 6?  If you're that much of a dirtbag about her handicap THEN WHY THE HELL DO YOU KEEP HER AROUND???  Someone needs to sow a brain into that ice rink you call a head. 

Ramsay to David: "No, no, NO YOU DON'T F@&#(!* KNOW!!!"  This is the most accurate statement said of David thus far this season.

Joe, humbled by Christine: "Christine, I'm sorry I'm such a douche and said that your team was doomed because you can't see.  I'm a stupid jerk but I have to act this way otherwise Fox will kick me off the show.  Sorry, babe."

Bitchin' Becky: She ran her team well.  Really well.  Very impressive. 

Frank, strategy extraordinaire: Remember early in the season when he had the opportunity to save one person on his team and he offered to save pretty much everyone except himself?  And that was seen as a good move?  Well, this is an even better move.  Final 6?  Guaranteed spot in the Final 5?  Hell yes he should save himself. 

Josh vs. David: Wait...how is David still on this show?

Elimination Test: Three cuts of filet minion (rare, medium rare, well done).  That's one taste test I wish I could judge.

Walmart steaks: Another example of terrible product placement. 

David, a hog in heat: "I'm sweating like a hog in heat."  I was thinking of maybe a boar in humidity, but whatever.

I'll say this - Gordon Ramsay doing the ole trickster move by making it seem like Josh was going home WAS JUST SO SHOCKING I WAS ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT!!! IT'S LIKE HE'S NEVER DONE THAT BEFORE!!!

Josh, empty threat deliverer: "Now I'm back in the competition.  I'm gonna have to take Frank down.  He's outta here." Josh delivering those promises is like Congress saying they plan to balance the budget year after year.

So David went home.  It's funny cause two weeks ago the promo was "ANOTHER SHOCKING ELIMINATION!" but was anybody really shocked that David went?  I don't even know how he made it to the top 6.  Pretty cool that Graham gave him a job, though.

Good episode!